Day 6 - 101 Days of Awesome

Ye Olde Internet is filled with plenty of funny stuff. But nobody smashes the nail on the head harder or more consistantly than The Onion. Here are a few awesome articles.

I'm Like A Chocoholic, But For Booze
Gay Teen Worried He Might Be Christian
Plan To Get Laid At DragonCon 2001 Fails
Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over'
 God Answers Prayers Of Paralyzed Little Boy 'No,' Says God
Don't Tell Me You've Never Wondered What Yoda's Penis Looks Like
Black Guy Asks Nation For Change
Pitchfork Gives Music 6.8

And probably the best one ever:
God Angrily Clarifies 'Don't Kill' Rule

 

Day 5 - 101 Days of Awesome

What is more awesome than bacon? Bacon wrapped steak. These are from Costco.

But that wasn't quite awesome enough. Not only did I have to wait a few minutes for the juices to settle, but the plate is too empty. I cooked up a side of my favorite vegetable, bacon. So what's more awesome than bacon wrapped steak? Bacon wrapped steak with a side of bacon.

Day 4 - 101 Days of Awesome

Of all the places I'm going this summer, the place I'm least excited about is the French Riviera. Remember, though, that's on a scale of awesome to super-freaking-amazing awesome. There's one thing I really want to see there, though, and that is the Marc Chagall Museum.

Marc Chagall is my favorite artist. First and foremost, I love his use of colors. You can glance at any of the images I have here and see that unique flavor that they have. Second, I love the almost cartoonish drawings. They wouldn't work, however, without the vibrant colors surrounding them. Finally, they are filled with life. You're looking a the action of someone's dream. Nothing, including the sun or moon in the sky, is just sitting there. Everything moves.

 

There's more here - it's all pretty awesome.

Day 3 - 101 Days of Awesome

A Confederacy of Dunces became one of my favorite books while I was only halfway through it. I'm rather disappointed with my friends who read. I don't understand why none of them ever recommended this to me. I didn't read it until a few years ago. I've missed out on a few rereadings over the years. Ignatius Jacques Reilly is immediately one of the best characters ever. Go read it!

Day 2 - 101 Days of Awesome

There are several videos, but this one is my favorite. The music is perfect, and dancing with others just shows pure joy. I've shown this is class before. Even the most cynical kids at first come around to it and find something to either smile at or just say "Cool." It gets me ready to travel this summer.

Day 1 - 101 Days of Awesome

For the next 101 days, I'm going to post something awesome. Since I often start things on my blog (Oscar Project) and don't finish them, I've actaully premade several posts. Plus, sometimes I'm just going to post it. I don't intent to write too much to make it easier. It's called 101 Days of Awesome. 

Day 1: My Grandma just passed away. This video was from her 90th birthday a few years ago. It was an awesome day, and she was an awesome person. She's going to be missed and remembered by many, many people.

2012 Oscar Roundup

I continue my tradition of watching all of the Best Picture nominees so you don't have to.

The best:  Argo and Lincoln were both high on my top 10 list. I'm rooting for Argo because, even though I ranked it a notch lower than Lincoln, it's probably a better movie. I'll be very happy if either of these win.

I'm cool if they win: Beasts of the Southern Wild, Zero Dark Thirty, and Django Unchained were all very good, and I'll be happy if any of them win. Django doesn't stand a chance, though. Beasts of the Southern Wild is such a cool and different movie that almost no one saw, so I'd be pretty happy if it wins. It definitely should have more eyes on it.

Middle of the Road: Life of Pi was good, but it's not an Oscar movie. Special effects, yes.Anything else, no. Still, it's better than the other.

Crap: Silver Linings Playbook, Les Miserables, Amour. Yuck, yuck, and yuck..I've written about Silver Linings and Les Miserables. I'll repeat what I believe - people didn't actually like Les Miserables. They like the music. I like the music, too. But not when Russell Crowe sings it. Or while looking at extreme closeups of boogers hanging out of their noses while they sing. Silver Linings Playbook had a horrible ending and unlikable main characters. Amour? Wow. It's definitely an interesting movie. It's the story of an elderly couple as one of them is dying. It does it differently than other similar movies. That's not always a good thing, though. When the closing credits first appeared, the woman behind me whispered, "What the fuck?"  I agree with her review. In fact, just replace everything I wrote with that.


Let's look as some other categories (excuse my lack of italics for the titles. I just don't feel like it):
Best Adapted Screenplay:  Beasts of the Southern Wild; I think any could win it.
Best Supporting Actress: Anne Hathaway will win, Helen Hunt should.
Best Supporting Actor: Tough call - any could win. I would give it to Tommy Lee Jones.
Best Animated Feature: I only saw Wreck-it Ralph and Brave. Give it to Wreck-it Ralph.
Best Foreign: I only saw Amour. It sucked. But it was also nominated for Best Picture, so they'll probably give it here.
Best Original Screenplay (didn't see Flight): Moonrise Kingdom would be awesome. Probably Zero Dark Thirty.
Best Director: Since Ben Affleck wasn't nominated, Spielberg (Lincoln) or Zeitlin (Beasts)
Best Actor (didn't see Flight): Ridiculous if Daniel Day Lewis doesn't win. Feels like the only lock in any category.
Best Actress: Wallis (Beasts) is actually the best choice, but won't win. Toss up between the other four.
Best Visual Effects (didn't see Snow White): Hobbit or Avengers for me. Life of Pi will probably win.
Best Cinematography (didn't see Anna): No freakin' clue. Roll a five sided die.
Best Costume Design (only saw Lincoln and Les Mis): uhhh.. Avengers?
Best Film Editing: Argo?
Best Documentary: I only saw Searching for Sugar Man. It was good. You should see it. No clue what will win, though.
Best Original Score (didn't see Anna): The only music I can really remember from any of these was Skyfall because it's Bond.
Best Original Song: Any song from Ted deserves to win.
I think there are more categories, but that's all for now. I didn't see the live action or animated shorts this year. They're usually lots of fun, so I hope to be back next year.

Pets That Suck

I had a dream about my Roomba. I was at home talking to someone else. While it was sliding around my house doing the dirty work, I decided that it would be a great idea to cover the Roomba with advertising. This would be a great source of income. I think that in the dream I described it as income for the Roomba instead of for me, the owner of the Roomba. That shows me that I subconsciously believe that I wouldn’t have been a good slave owner.

I continued to discuss the possibilities in advertising on the Roomba. Unfortunately, the obvious observation had to be mentioned (in the nondream world, this would have stopped the conversation before it started). Since the Roomba cleans my house, no enough eyes will be on the Roomba. Who is going to pay for advertising like that?

In the dream world, the conversation begins. We’ll have to send the Roomba out into the workplace. My advertising covered Roomba would go into an office building. It would zoom in and out of offices of many important people. It would glide down the hallways of some of the most prestigious offices in all the land.

That’s when we near the end of the dream. The following exchange happened between me and my conversation partner.

“You know what they call a Roomba in an office building?”

“What’s that?”

“A janitor.”

I woke up before we could discuss why janitors don’t wear pretty much the same thing as a NASCAR driver. It's a conversation the nation should have.

Alpha Centauri (Rigil Kentaurus)

Number 1 - Moonrise Kingdom

Here's the deal with Wes Anderson movies. They are always a mix of weird and fun. Your enjoyment of the movie depends on how much of the weird becomes fun for you.

I enjoyed Rushmore and the Royal Tenenbaums despite the weirdness.The weirdness was all right, and I enjoyed the characters enough to like both movies.

In The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou and The Darjeeling Limited, the weird became too quirky to enjoy the entire films. I liked Darjeeling more, and there are some really great parts.

With all of those movies, and Bottle Rocket before those, there are plenty of little bits to like. But there's also a bit of a barrier that you have to get past to enjoy the movies as a whole, one that I never really could.

In Moonrise Kingdom, Wes Anderson nailed the right balance. The weird became fun.

The characters worked and worked together. But they never became too weird that you couldn't relate to them. You continue to like the characters.

The plot has its moments of weird, but they work. You never feel lost and instead enjoy the ride.

In my Avengers review, I mentioned a few great scenes from this year. Add one more. The opening scene introduces us to the characters in the family by moving in and out of the rooms of the house. It's absolutely beautifully done, and had me hooked for the rest of the movie.

I wonder is making The Fantastic Mr. Fox led to Anderson pulling everything together. Since it was made primarily for kids, he had to reign in the weird enough to make it all fun. I hope he has it all dialed in. If so, we're going to see some really cool things from him in the future.

Barnard's Star (BD+04°3561a)

Number 2 - The Intouchables

Some years, the number one movie decision is easy. Last year, 50/50 was the top movie. Period. End of story. Other year, I go back and forth between two or more movies. This is one of those years. 

My number one and two movies could have switched places had my mood been different when I created the list. So know that The Intouchables could very well be the best movie of the year.

The story itself is fairly recognizable. Paralyzed man gets an unconventional assistant, and they end up changing each others' lives. And honestly, you could probably tell much of the story before seeing it. This isn't a "guess what's going to happen next" type of movie.

But The Intouchables avoids the cliches that you're expecting. The story isn't exactly what you're expecting. Most importantly, neither character is who you think they are.

I like movies with good characters. Both of these characters are unique and have their own story to tell. Put together, they create an amazing dynamic.

Perhaps best of all is this: The Intouchables is a true story of a quadriplegic. I said earlier that you can probably figure out the basic story. The tone, however, is not what you're expecting. Movies involving illnesses or handicaps usually have a heavy weight to them. While good, they can be a bit of a bummer. Watching, you'll cry every now and again. But the pure sensation of fun will outnumber the tears.

I challenge you to dislike this.I challenge you to then find someone who wouldn't like it. You'll lose. Unlike my number one movie, The Intouchables is for everybody.